Synopsis: When their adopted son’s devout Catholic biological mother announces she will be attending his wedding, the Griffin family must suppress their sacrilegious lifestyle to avoid any awkwardness.
Who is Don Griffin?
Don Griffin wants you to know he’s cool with it. What is ‘it’ exactly? Just, like, everything. In the first three minutes of the movie, he talks about how much he loves cunnilingus before going down on his partner Bebe in the kitchen just as his ex-wife Ellie walks in.
Weirdly, that scene is more uncomfortable for the viewer than it is for the characters, who take the encounter in stride. That’s because sex is an open topic in the Griffin household. They wear their divorces, infidelities, and sexual exploits so far down their sleeves, they ooze off their skin and smear onto your cheeks when they pull you in for an unwanted face-grab kiss.
Don is the horniest of them all. He’s a softy in the heart with a hardy in the pants—a line he surprisingly doesn’t say in this movie. But don’t let Don’s obsession with intercourse and his whimsical hobby of sculpting erotic art deceive you—he is not a perfect man. It comes to light that he and Ellie divorced after she found out he cheated on her with her best friend Bebe. And then, halfway through the movie, he turns around and cheats on Bebe with Ellie.
His Don Juan habits have also affected his children. Lyla, his eldest daughter, resents him for inheriting his poor relationship skills, while Jared, his youngest son, has decided to remain a virgin, presumably because he’s witnessed the negative impact sex had on his parents’ marriage.
The Big Wedding could explore those somewhat interesting deeper emotions, but it doesn’t. Instead, it opts to focus on Don’s dalliances and Jared losing his virginity. The ‘big wedding,’ this movie is allegedly about, is largely an afterthought. Frankly this whole movie feels like an afterthought, especially when you have a title as uninspired as “The Big Wedding.”
Who’s in the Circle of Trust?
Everyone in the Griffin family, which includes Alejandro, Lyla and Jared, as well as Don’s ex-wife Ellie and his longtime girlfriend Bebe.
Alejandro is Don and Ellie’s adopted Colombian son. He is played by a British actor with no Hispanic heritage. Alejandro (or Al, as his white family calls him) has no discernible personality outside of making pained facial expressions whenever his family is being cringe.
Lyla refers to her father by his first name, as if to say she doesn’t consider him a parent. In an effort to mend their relationship, Don makes the ludicrous decision to invite her estranged husband Andrew to the wedding. It somehow pays off, as Lyla patches things up with Andrew and then Don patches things up with Lyla.
Jared is abstaining from sex until he meets “the right one.” Turns out “the right one” is Alejandro’s 20-year-old biological sister, Nuria, who is basically also Jared’s sister. He works very hard to have sex with her after seeing her naked, but she denies his advances. Instead of attending their own brother’s wedding, the two spend the evening upstairs in the house where Jared makes one last desperate push to seal the deal. Eventually she gives in. No one cares that they don’t show up for the reception, probably because it’s normal in this family to prioritize sex over everything else—even family.
Despite Alejandro’s shame, Lyla’s hatred, and Jared’s light incest, all three children remain firmly in the Circle of Trust.
Of course, there’s also Ellie. Sure, she cheated on Don and Don cheated on her, but adultery and infidelity just aren’t that big a deal in this family. While there’s some post-divorce frostiness, Don will always love, respect, trust and be sexually attracted to Ellie.
As for Bebe, he trusts her enough to share with her that his and Ellie’s recent morning sex lasted 40 minutes. Don proposes to Bebe not even 24 hours after cheating on her. She says yes for some reason.
We might as well include Father Monaghan, the priest that marries Alejandro and Missy. He and Don did AA together three times and have developed a sort of banter-y friendship.
Who’s out of the Circle of Trust?
As a man with an insatiable libido, Don looks down on any organized religion—especially Catholicism—that shames his carnal urges. He says something to the effect of: “Anyone who comes at me with [religious stuff], I’ll kneecap them!” With this threat in mind, Catholicism, as well as any other religion, is out of the Circle of Trust.
Join us next week for: City by the Sea (2002) [Currently viewable for free on Plex, Tubi and Hoopla]
Check out the Robert De Niro Circle of Trust spreadsheet here.
What is this project?
Nothing like being a catholic for the ultimate kinkiness ! Sweet read